Our Cul-de-sac of Dreams

I guess I’m a little fed up right now. Maybe you are too. 

Right now when I hear some of our Methodist leaders I find the phrase “cul-de-sac of dreams” comes to mind. As far as I know it originates in a Mary Chapin Carpenter song “The Long Way Home” on her 2001 album “Time, Sex, Love.”

 A cul-de-sac is a particularly safe kind of neighborhood. No through traffic. Easy to just keep going around in circles. Strangers enter only if they are lost. 

So what makes a cul-de-sac of dreams? The moment when public image becomes more important than lived reality. We build houses of cards on cul-de-sacs of dreams when public relations become more important than the truth. And that happens most easily when we adopt the same language and ethos of promotion typical of American corporate culture.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m all in for inculturation. I wrote book about inculturation of the gospel: The Gospel among the Nations, Orbis Press 2013. And I’m all about evangelism and witnessing to the gospel in new and different cultural settings so that people can find life in Christ. And I have no problem with websites and social media. I personally manage three YouTube channels and their matching Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter accounts.

But using contemporary media is quite different from following other American institutions down the rabbit hole of their own delusions and self-destruction. 

We need to say that because right now we whether United or disaffiliated, Methodists are creating the same self-serving narratives as our corporate and political analogues. And we are reaching into the same buzzword box as PR firms selling automobiles, summer fashions, pharmaceuticals, and investment strategies. We publish the narratives in our blogs while we throw those words on our own marquee. Our denomination is “vibrant,” “embracing,” “visionary,” “alive.” Our rebranded congregations are “community-minded” with a “global outlook” and “family values.” We are “passionate,” “extravagant,” “open,” and “brave.”  In short we’re just like the local branch of the national bank before it closed its doors and was replaced by an ATM. 

Maybe you’ve already done it; reached into the buzzword box to find some new words to slap on the website or hashtag on your Twitter feed: “integrity,” “diversity,” “consistency”, “innovation,” “tradition,” “values,” “united,” “faithful,” “revolutionary.” If it is one of those special months, choose that group of people and throw it in as well. Then you can pick up on the larger media buzz and appeal to a new constituency. Pick a word you saw on an airport advertisement, paste it into your infographic, and then add some stock photos of smiling people of diverse ethnicities and you’re ready to sell your Methodist product. 

Words that a suburban developer would use for a new neighborhood or a retirement home are very useful, whether you actually are in that neighborhood or not. So to name your Methodist church choose from the following: lake, mill, wood, vineyard, community, highland, park, river, ocean, creek, legacy,  and so on. Grab “global” from the box and throw it, along with “intentional” and “mindful” into your site description. Don’t mention climate change, too political, but visual references to earth as a big blue ball, or nature in its most beautiful forms will enhance you website and suggest some consciousness of ecology. 

Crosses are no longer in fashion unless they are so stylized as to be unrecognizable. So choose a logo that catches the eye but is as blandly non-committal as a Christian radio station and you are ready to go. Or go with a secular dog whistle if you’re reaching for a particular political constituency. 

And for heaven’s sake don’t forget to brand your worship. Remember that the brand is the product. Who cares what happens when the customer opens the box. 

Most importantly: remember that God’s grace may be freely given but we’re selling a product with a lot of sunk costs. We need an ROI, so Methodism must be bought and therefore must be sold.

Go for it. Years ago I wrote about how the UM bishops had decided to suddenly become CEOs; with everything becoming about metrics, measured effectiveness, and reaching new markets. That is still with us, and still fails to highlight what really matters in Christian ministry. Worse, with our metrics tanking we Methodists must no go all in with marketing hype; selling dreams and buzz as if they were the same as loving communities and a relationship with God through Christ. 

“If you’d come today, You could have reached the whole nationIsrael in 4 BC had no mass communication.”

The line, spoken by Judas in JC Superstar, was supposed to be ironic. Now it is taken in earnest by the designers of our very own Methodist cul-de-sacs of dreams. And yet, 

“when we wake up, we still live,in a house of cards.” (MCC, 1994, Stones in the Road)

Houses of cards in cul-de-sacs of dreams. Is that really all we’ve got? I don’t think so. I think we have fabulous congregations, big and small, doing great ministry. But the further we get from the people in the pew and on the ground and the higher the cost for keeping the lights on then the greater the pull of gravity from the black hole of PR hype. 

Maybe we should stop with the narratives and buzz words, leave the cards falling around us, and turn our self-referential cul-de-sac into a highway. “Make straight the way of the Lord.” 

Maybe we could be a place that invites people not with buzz-words and half truths, but with something far more simple and profound, “Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” 

Nahhh. Those words just aren’t trending.